-growl-

super frustrated with my right hand.
i am woken up every morning, not by my alarm clock, but by my hand.
woken up cause it's numb, so numb that it turns into swelling pain.
and then it takes forever to go back to normal.
clenching and relaxing my fist, forearm stretching, don't seem to help much.
and i'm very particular with my sleeping position now.
i'll hug my pillow, and place my arm on the pillow.
but every morning it's still the sameeeee. -growl-
can't even have a good sleep in peace! -_-Zzz
and even when it goes back to normal, when i start doing simple stuff, it comes back.
especially eating. :/
why huh? i mean, i don't think i put a lot of pressure on my hand when i'm eating. -_-"
oh and it comes back even when i'm on the couch watching tv doing NOTHING.
(@*&$(@*&)#@$

today is the worst.
i got up cause of the swelling.
which took hours to subside.
and now i'm still left with tinkling sensation in my fingers.
could it be the blood flow to my hand being restricted cause of tight muscles?
but can't possibly be no blood flow the whole day right, my hand would be dead by now. -_-"
and i don't think it's the old wrist injury... my wrists are totally fine.
hmmmm.

maybe i should see the sports doctor after race.

haircut!

am finally gonna get a haircut tomorrow!
been procrastinating for damn long, and since there's time tomorrow, better do it.
shall get up early and try to be the first person there, don't want to wait.

plus got to rush down to meet the rest at cityhall.
my group is pretty fun to be around with, no tension and can get along well.
and i especially like the part where we get things done fast!
it's like we've formed some kind of machinery belt. maha.
still not that quite on time though... but not too bad i guess.
hopefully we can finally get over and done with the first part!
and start on the second! which should be simpler i hope.
targeting 40 tomorrow, hope we can do it. :D
saturday is yet another sessionnnn.
am hoping to clear 50 by this weekend, but seems a little bit impossible.
nevermind... shall do what we can.
deadline next wednesdayyyyy. argggg!
and not to forget the other assignment, gonna chiong on saturday also.
oh man, gonna be a busy weekend.

hmm. maybe i should finally use the deuter bag i bought some time ago.
i got it for $37.50, compared with $60+ (already discounted) outside! :D
haven't used it cause i'm too lazy to transfer my stuff over.
ah shall see how.

and i've decided that i'm not going to buy honey lemon or honey water from the liang cha shop at TM anymore.
though it's nice, it's not exactly liang cha.
plus for that kind of price, not very worth it. (not liang anyway, not of any help)
and i realised i've got a lot of honey and lemon at home, can make it myself. -_-"

i actually can't wait for macau to come.
finally a breakkkk and mini holidayyy.
although there's race... but still! something to look forward to. :D
and it'll be the first time we're taking plane together as a team. lol
hope everything goes well.

and! smarty is the cutest dog on earth. :D

cheating.

i watched the trailer for some movie.
and then in this movie there're two couples, and one from each pair was cheating on their partners with each other.

seriously, why do people have to cheat?
i mean... if you really don't love your partner anymore and like someone else, split it!
spare that person the additional pain man!
everything would be clean and things would be so much more simple.
you'd be happy with your new love, your ex probably would be able to get over you faster.

and if you're cheating for fun, well you probably don't even deserve a decent relationship.
if you really love and care about your partner, you wouldn't even think about cheating on her.
there's no grey area.
and you can't love 2 person at the same time.
well okay maybe some people really can do that.

oh well.
i guess we are all just humans. -roll eyes-

good day.

today is a good day.
finally no cat 1 from him, though almost. :S
hopefully can carry on from here. wheee.

oh and finally saw my old pig.
miss the good old days!
am still very glad that i had the opportunity to know her and work with her.
saw her a couple of times when i was in np.
she graduated when i entered... but then she came back again.
i'm lucky. :)

finally off tomorrow!
and i don't have to bathe the dogs. hmmm.
what shall i do then... :S
think i'll just end up lazing at home. -_-Zzz

i've decided to cut my hair on friday though it's very long and thick now.
anyway i only go for trainings and stay at home... ugly also nevermind. lol
am thinking if i should finally use the diy dye which i bought last year. hurhur.

oh and finally finally ordered the m frame jade iridium!
found another supplier cause the previous one took too damn long to confirm the orders.
but now i got to wait damn long... like at least a month cause it's currently out of stock.
it's okay... it's worth the wait. hopefully can come before macau!
and i think i'll change the socks to slate (grey) color. :D
it's too damn white!
the lens is jade iridium, but the frame/icon/socks are all white. D:
if only can change the icon to gold or gunmetal. :(

and i've got my hall allocation alreadyyyy. hall 8!
but level 6, got to climb damnnn high.
it's okay, train my legs.
will be staying with my younger sister, should be quite alright.
we've decided to cook at least a few meals per week to save money. haha.
thank god i've got her, we can do lots of stuff together! :D

okay, seems like a very "empty" entry.
shall end off!

shagggg.

quite a fruitful day.
not perfect, but not too bad.
maybe shouldn't ask for too much sometimes.

woke up damn freaking early todayyyyy.
luckily it was sessions pretty well spent, though if only it was always like that.
was soooo shag i went home immediately.
showered, ate a bit, and napped.
had a good sleep! felt... peaceful.
maybe the weather was pretty good too, considering i slept with fan and it wasn't stuffy.

dinner with familyyyyy. rock. :D
am so glad i decided to come home to spend time AT HOME.
seldom home and i feel guilty about it.
but today was good, finally quality dinner with mum.

i am tasked with bathing the dogs tomorrow.
but i don't know if i have the time to do so.
maybe i'll just bathe smarty, then the other two on tuesday. hmmm.

should i get the m frame jade iridium???!!!
argggg.... it's probably about $170, pretty damn good deal.
but i feel guilty spending moneyyyy. arggggg.
okay shall decide tomorrow.

it's starting to get a little bit humid. -growl-
wish it would rain right now.
am longing for good sleep everynight.
it's probably the best thing that can happen in my daily lifestyle right now. lol

and i love smarty dearrrrr.
she was whining again when i was checking her for ticks.
like puppy! when she is like how old already. still whine. -_-"
like you know, she's gonna cry. hur.

okay shall sleep in awhileeeee.
monday is finally here! WOOHOO!

let it go.

oh man i just tried planning my timetable for next semester.
it sucks big time! D:
i have 43 AUs left and am thinking if i should chiong 26AU again so i'll only have 17AU left to clear in second semester.
but 26AU is so horrifying. plus the 26AU mean 7 papers!
unless i am lucky and manage to get one of the sports science elective which is non-examinable.
which i'm praying i get.
then i'll have 6 papers to chiong, like last semester.
am intending to keep my specialization of nanotechnology and green processing.
for my second specialization maybe i'll just anyhow just grab whatever that fits in. hur.
the thought of chionging another semester is... -_-Zzz

i feel better today. :D
and i hope it gets better!

crossfit.

Crossfit Games 2010 Arnold Classic

this is insane!
the ladies are like wow. some don't even look like athletes!
i don't even think i can complete any of the exercises. D:
especially the deadlift + arnold burpees combo.
INSANE!

looks rather interesting though.
a lot of training and mental strength. D:
is there a crossfit training club in Singapore?
maybe i should start considering my options when i graduate. lol.
already preparing for my dragonboat withdrawal syndrome. :X

outing with elaine and suat was awesomeeeee!
finally walked around town, though i think it's nothing much.
probably cause there wasn't anything i wanted to get... so it was more of walking around aimlessly.
but i did get a taste of the ice chocolate at spinellis! all time favourite.
plus dinner treat by suat at sun with moon! :D

it was just great hanging out with really old friends and updating each other.
i think the last time we actually met together was like 6 years ago. lol
i've known elaine since primary 5 when we were classmates and table partners.
that's like... 12-13 years ago.
suat was my kindergarten classmate, we then went to the same primary school, same secondary school.
she went to jc but i went to poly, but we both ended up in ntu again. hahaha.
i think she's the longest friend i have, that's like 17-18 years. :X
gosh... we are getting old. :S

actually i kind of can't wait for school to start.
don't know why ey...
maybe time pass faster when busy.
rather than waiting for time to pass right now. haha

let's see... another year of school...
after i'm done with school there's my last sdbf...
then my grad trip with batchmates...
most likely planning another trip with suat and elaine to somewhere near to chill...
then it's worklife.
sounds like a good plan. :D

the trap.

today i was reminded about something by a dear batchmate of mine.
i'm very very glad she highlighted that to me.
cause my conscious self would never have wanted to become like that.

seriously, i'm so thankful for the people around me.
that's something i am thankful for everyday of my life.
it's probably the best thing that can happen.
those few people are probably the only ones who will highlight such stuff to me.
nobody else would do that.
and that's how much they care for me, and trust me that i trust them enough to be receptive.
that's how much we know each other.

i got to learn. let it go. be more conscious. be more tactful.
will not sink into that trap.
it's great to know that i have these people watching over me.
and i will watch over the people around me as much as i can.
and hope to continue to be a listening ear.

things may not be smooth right now.
but i still hold the believe and hope, that things will fall in place eventually.
and we will keep working, we will not stop.
because we are definitely stronger than what we/others think we are.

collapse.

i feel like just collapsing.
today is oh man back breaking experience.
more to comeeeee.

tomorrow i'm finally going out to see the world. lol
going out with primary school friends elaine and suat!
shall walk around town and see the changes. -_-"
i can't even remember whens the last time i actually went out to walk around or something.
i didn't even go out to buy CNY clothes this year. hurhurhur.
been too absorbed with school and trainings. *_*
okay at least something exciting in my life tomorrow. :X

back is achingggg. maybe i should sleep early tonightttt.
i think the back of my tongue is swollen.
need to spam liangcha and water. -_-"

whiner.

today was torture dayyyy.
i sound sick. i mean, i don't exactly enjoy torture.
but you always feel accomplished when you get through it.

why does it always rain on important days???
and the rain is so punctual, seriously. :/

torture was TORTURE.
especially the starting part.
the last part was unexpectedly fun though!
it wasn't that good, but it wasn't as bad as i thought it would.
maybe no expectations works best for me. :)
slowly and gradually.
got to adjust and rectify.
but good move and response.

after that was meet up with dear friends!
bumped into other friends! cool.
nice to just hang out and just chill. :)
hope to do that again soon!

we came to a conclusion that old people tend to whine a lot, A LOT.
seriously! lol we are like the ultimate whiners.
but we whine just to let it out, in the end we will still do what we have to do at our very best.
starting to embrace the age hahaha

i'm burnt, again.
my body is like emitting heat right now.
damn it. maybe i can fry an egg on my thighs.
and i'm feeling sleepy and tired already.
it's only 10pm. D:
thank god i can sleep the day away tomorrow. woohoo!

oh and cheryl is gonna sponsor me my oakleys m frame jade iridium as birthday present!
cheers for working siblings! WOOHOO!

good day.

it's a good day to row some boats.
i usually try to tell myself that before trainings, gives me hope. :)

i am home earlyyyy.
okay larh not that early, but could have been later since i didn't go for lunch.
was still full from the break, think i ate too much.
luckily i didn't puke if not... :S

today feels better than what i had expected personally.
it's a good thing.
but there's always: what's next?
but okay, shall be contented for now.
oh and i am suddenly reminded of this:
expect the unexpected.
i guess we have to assume the perfect scenario, for others.
then using their perfect scenario, what can be done on our part.
cause we can't control others, we can only control ourselves.
am i talking sense?

and today i am impressed by someone.
quietly and unnoticed, she came a long, long way.
i am like "wow", and i'm not someone who is easily impressed to this extent. haha

i think if keep it up... it's going to be exciting. :D

and if continue... maybe my dream is realizable. :D
domination!

it's coming.

i think my temper's pretty bad these days.
urh... should start reflecting and try to calm myself down once in awhile.
i guess cause there's not a lot of time left, and i don't want to waste time on mistakes/commands/etc.
but then again, should calm down, things will flow.

i hate this part of the year!
the pressure and all on one stupid race. grrr.
guess it's pretty finalised... unless i make some stupid mistakes.
i hope i won't if not i'll be such a let down. :S
don't like the pressure.

thought could have a good rest at home tomorrow.
but there's coxing job againnnn.
9.30 to 4.30pm.
oh man, it's good money, so i shouldn't complain.
anyway it's at kallang, pretty convenient.
maybe i can interact with ah hee more too, understand his plans and such.

i have to overcome the fear.
well, there's nothing to think about.
just row.

more fruitful day.

i finally cleared my room today.
okay not exactly everything, but just those junk at the corner of the room which i've been wanting to clear.
my table's finally neater too.
filed all my last sem 26AU worth of notes plus IA stuff. :D
and now my cupboard is so full of school stuff it looks like it's gonna collapse anytime.
that cupboard contains my poly notes plus 3 years uni notes, plus my younger sister's school stuff.
no wonder it's gonna collapse.
i shall get a cupboard of my own when we move house, which is i don't know when.
okay actually there's still a stack of papers which i want to throw but got to find paper recycle bin.
don't feel comfortable just dumping them into normal bin.
save the earth!

and i accompanied mum for grocery shopping!
feels accomplished though it's just a small gesture of how much i love her. lol
had to help her carry all the rice, detergent etc etc.
i finally felt useful for mum. haha
oh and i bought the ingredients for potato salad.
oh shit. i forgot about the mayo! D:
shall try to get it on friday.
i think i'll make potato salad for the team on saturday for double session break. :D

okay let's see what else did i do... okay nothing else.
except that i checked all three dogs for ticks and fleas.
it's like a daily routine now, i think it's becoming a weird hobby.
it's good bonding session with them though considering i'm not always around :X
they have very different characters!
smarty whines A LOT. seriously!
i mean okay it may be a little bit painful cause i have to pull out those blood suckers.
but i don't think it's THAT painful.
she just kept whining and whining non-stop. -___-"
and charbie act fierce and will attempt to bite me.
he'll growl whenever he knows i found something and am gonna pull them out.
if i fiddle with a particular area for too long he will really attempt to bite me.
usually i will just stop awhile and pat him to let him calm down before resuming.
but today i tried out his bite, let him bite.
actually... it's not painful at all. he didn't exactly bite.
he'll just act fierce and them jump to grab my fingers with his mouth, but he doesn't really bite.
it's like he just put my fingers into his mouth. -_-" hurhur
marbie just growls non-stop until he gets tired and just let me do what i want with him. lol

am drinking nutritea barley!
i think it's the favourite drink of the year. :D